I love my job, I love my job........

How many times do I need to say that before I truly believe it? Ok, my job isnt that bad, but it can be frustrating, especially around this time of the month. The third, fourth and fifth workdays are always stressful, since they mark the end of the month-end close period. Today was no different. As usual, I was up against the wall, having discovered a crucial issue shortly before final numbers were supposed to be posted. And as one would expect, I committed the ultimate sin - I made a mistake. Not a big one, but here in LaLa Land, all my errors are major. Fortunately, I wasn't alone, so it may get overlooked. Or else I'll get slammed in November again, as was the case last year. Got hauled into a meeting and told that a letter was going into my personnel file because I'd failed to adequately support my departments - in September. Actually, it was stuff related to August. Never mind that I was learning an entirely new position (and basically, no more knowledgeable than a new hire) or that I didn't want the position in the first place; no, the benefit to this sandbagging was that they could justify a lower bonus and merit increase, and thereby come in under budget for the year.

You know, my job is that bad.

So why do I fret over whether I should switch to full time or not?